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Message Board

 From: Jeannine Carlisle
 5/20/08

 I was searching for a photo for my digital art project that I was working on at the time.
 When I stumbled across this website. I looked at some photos, listened to some music
 and read some of Rachel's poetry. She is an amazing poet and I really look up to her.
 She seems to have been an amazing person and I really wish that I could have met her.
 Her poetry has really inspired me to write more of MY own thoughts down and it turns out that
 it makes me feel a whole lot better about every thing that has been going on. And HER poetry
 has helped me through some of my problems or at least simplified them. I have read every poem,
 song and thoughts there is to read. And I have listened to all their songs. Their Music is.. insane. I love it.
 And It's to bad that they couldn't have expressed more of their talent through other songs that they
  had yet to create and sing. I'm looking forward to more of Rachel's  poetry and artwork and I wish your family  the best.


 From:  Jackie Goodman
 3/01/08

  I stumbled upon Rachel and Cody's website...the entire thing is a work of art. It's beautiful and loving.......
 Jackie Goodman


 From: Michelle Mitchell
 1/16/08

 Your pictures are wonderful and memorable. What a great way to treasure your children!
 AND what wonderful parents you are to let them really live! You are very special people too~


  From: Jacquie
 12/08/07
 
  Hi,  Just thinking of you today.   Love,  Jacquie


 From: Julia Hinkle
 12/01/07

 From: Adel
 08/28/07

 hi,
 I very randomly came to find rachel and cody's music. i read about them, and i think it's so beautiful
 that Rachel's mother is posting the music and art and writing in their memory. the music and art and
 musings are all so beautiful and insightful. i could go on and on about my situation and the timing of
 how i found this..but i just want to say that this all really struck to my heart and the fact that you are
 putting up the material in their memory really touches me so much. pretty much- what i have seen
 and felt on this computer screen is something i am taking with me beyond here. i just want to say
 thank you, and may we all be so blessed to have such beautiful people in our lives.
 genuinely,
 adel.


 From : Linda
 04/28/07

 I do not think I have been so moved by anything in a long time.  Two such bright lights....
 thank you so much for sharing their lives with me.  I will return again and again to these writings. 
 Your daughter's spirit is just amazing.  I will look at my children differently today because of Rachel and Cody.


 From :  chloe
 04/25/07

 Godspeed to all, So touching are the lovely pictures and beautiful music.
 I am true with out words to say how deeply I have been touched so …. take care
 Love bleueyedson

 From : Jacquie (mom)
 04/24/07

  I'm listening to David Gray's "Shine" and thinking of you.
 You are shining where you are and our spirits shine together.
  We'll go together where we can shine on that distant shore.
  I love you and miss you.  Your light shines on!


 From : darnell (mom)
 04/23/07

 It's been awhile since I've posted here.  Just wanted to tell you how much you mean to me.
 I celebrate the lives you are living.  I know you can not physically return to me but,
 I can come to you always.  Your spirits grow brighter every day.  thanks for all the moments ..
 love you for eternity Rachie & Cody ..


 From : mic
 04/16/07

 A previous reviewer has noted there are no words to adequately express what is said and found here!
 It is spiritual, it is meaningful, it is from the heart to the soul! It is a priceless jewel among stumbling
 treasurers, to find it is to have been touched by something powerful, and the seeker does not leave unchanged!
 Thank you for the sharing and thank you the two souls who gave meaning to what is the purpose of life!

 From : Sherrie
 04/14/07

 Blessings to you --- I don't think the Boulder residence ever registered until today...
 what a perfectly Bohemian-ish life they did live...old souls at so very young - seeing
 the world through the compassionate lens of the heart. I would have said they should
 have been in Boulder, but it somehow amazes me that they were - that is so oddly...comforting.

 I am grateful that you post their writing and their music -- it goes beyond appreciation for their art,
 or their devotion to each other or even to their fellow man - which is so beautiful and so...poignantly
  rare. It seems that their legacy takes on the deeper questions of higher purpose that causes me
 to sense, as i'm reading, listening and looking - that there's something in their destiny to discover.
 I don't yet know how it will take shape exactly - but I sense it is very much beyond...something.
 That may sound new age-ish - it's not.

 I likely sound like a nut to you as I hurt my brain trying to accurately describe what I believe I almost
 discern and it's so weird -- that's unusual for me, and I sense it each time I visit here --- perhaps it's
 just something I am to glean personally... I will continue to explore -- their message compels me.
 Perhaps that's all I should have said.

 What amazingly wonderful people.


 From :  Dave of Conspiracy Assassins (no longer D2) - Ha!
 04/12/07

 What's up!  I love you and miss you both so much!!  I apologize in advance for the length of this...
 I've got some things for you that I had to share.  I've kept them to myself for too long.  Once again,
 it looks like tea for one...again.  I miss you both.  Emotions flow with fearlessness every time I get
 on this website.  Your parents are amazing.  Anyway, for Rachel and Cody, and any other music
 lovers who stumble upon this website...

 "His ear drank in the fugue; it seemed to him that he was hearing music for the first time in his life.
 Behind the music being created in his presence he sensed the world of Mind, the joy-giving harmony
 of law and freedom, service and rule.  He surrendered himself, and vowed to serve that world and this
 Master.  In those few minutes he saw himself and his life, saw the whole cosmos guided, ordered, and
 interpreted by the spirit of music.  And when the playing had come to and end, he saw this magician and
 king for whom he felt so intense a reverence pause for a little while longer, slightly bowed over the keys,
 with half-closed eyes, his face softly glowing from within.  Joseph did not know whether he ought to rejoice
 at the bliss of this moment, or weep because it was over."
 "For the present Joseph was incapable of reflecting on possible practical consequences, on all that might
 flow out of this event, for he was much too preoccupied with the immediate reverberations of it within himself.
 Like a young plant hitherto quietly and intermittently developing which suddenly begins to breathe harder and
 to grow, as though in a miraculous hour it has become aware of the law which shapes it and begins to strive
 toward the fulfillment of its being, the boy, touched by the magician's hand, began rapidly and eagerly to gather
 and tauten his energies. He felt changed, growing; he felt new tensions and new harmonies between himself
 and the world.  There were times, now, in music, Latin, and mathematics, when he could master tasks that
 were still far beyond his age and the scope of his schoolmates. Sometimes he felt capable of any achievements.
 At other times he might forget everything and daydream with a new softness and surrender, listen to the wind
 or the rain, gaze into the chalice of a flower or the moving waters of the river, understanding nothing, divining
 everything, lost in sympathy, curiosity, the craving to comprehend, carried away from his own self toward another,
 toward the world, toward the mystery and sacrament, the at once painful and lovely disporting of the world of appearances."

 I've got something else to share, I'll post again in a second-you two will definitely appreciate the next post.  Truth.
 We all lived searching for it, and I believe that the two of you lived this life and knew far more than most.  And now
 you know more than any of us.  It's snowing out here, and I'm smiling, and I blame Rachel and Cody!  
 Big sigh, little tear.  Love ya-

Continued From :  Dave of Conspiracy Assassins (no longer D2) - Ha!

 Here's the other one I promised.  My kids are 2 and 4 now.   I'm so sorry that they didn't get to hang out with you.  
 You would have added so much to their lives.  I also have a third one on the way.  Yeah, make the jokes...I'll laugh
 with you.  I'm laughing with you!!!  Come on.  Anyway, big hugs to your parents, -you really have no idea how much
 I truly respect you all, and appreciate what you've done here.  It's so incredible to read through the posts on here.  
 Thank you again.  Here's the next one-
 "Oh, if only it were possible to find understanding," Joseph exclaimed. "If only there were a dogma to believe in.
 Everything is contradictory, everything tangential; there are no certainties anywhere. Everything can be interpreted
 one way and then again interpreted in the opposite sense. The whole of world history can be explained as development
 and progress and can also be seen as nothing but decadence and meaningless. Isn't there any truth? Is there no real
 and valid doctrine?"
 The Master had never heard him speak so fervently. He walked on in silence for a little, then said: "There is truth, my boy.
  But the doctrine you desire, absolute, perfect dogma that alone provides wisdom, does not exist. Nor should you long
 for a perfect doctrine, my friend. Rather, you should long for the perfection of yourself. The deity is within you, not in ideas
 and books. Truth is lived, not taught. Be prepared for conflicts, Joseph Knecht-I can see they have already begun."
 These are things that made me think and smile, just like the two of you did.  I'll keep carrying your flame, thanks for
 adding to my bellyfire for life.  I miss you both so much.  Cody-I wish you could play on my newest bass rig.  We could
 make some amazing abrasive chaos through this rig.  Rachel-I still have the poster up for your guest appearance with us.
 I wish your voice could fill our studio everyday.  But you are still singing in my heart.  Thanks,


 From:  Courtney B.
 03/17/07

 Hello Rach! Happy birthday... three cheers for the day 'o' green!
 I love you. And still miss you everyday.


 From:  Cyn
 02/25/07
 
 I'm so very sorry about these two.  It's very tragic.  Godspeed, Cody and Rachel.


 From:  Brandon
 02/22/07

 just thinking about the kids..
 

 From:  Rachel
 02/20/07

 I came across this page while going through my latest "fling" with depression after losing my brother.
 it has been almost a year and I still cannot get over it or even begin to know how to deal with it.  What you
 have done for your children is amazing.  What it does for others is even more amazing. I am  afraid of "forgetting"
 my brother. Does that make sense? I guess so... that is why I found this site...


 From:  Karen
 02/06/07

 From:  Rhonda
 01/29/07

 From:  Stephanie
 01/25/07
 

 From:   Boyd
 01/22/07
 It was and still is a true honor to know whom I know and have known. For this I am I am forever in your debt.
 Memories last forever. I realize that we are simple servants to those we love. To Darnell and Dale I love you
 and hold you in a higher place then anyone I know. To Rachel, I need not say here. I told you all that needs to
 be said the day you died. The true meaning of life has been shown to me because of you. I’m still here and
 wait for your response. To Cody, Damn dude I always wanted the best for you. You earned that and I saw it
 in your eyes. We had a weird relationship but we both kept our honor. That is what separates you and I from
 the rest. You were a great man. I am in your dept for eternity.

 Death has no meaning when what you want is on the other side. A hug or a pat on the head. In time… In time…

 From:  Patty
 0!/22/07
 It seems almost impossible that its been two years since you both left us.
 I still think about you everyday. Thank you for being a presence in my life lately.
 I love you and miss you with all my heart.


 From:  Mom (Jacquie)
 0!/19/07
 Almost two years.  Seems like only yesterday you were first gone.  I miss you.


 From:  Polli
 11/17/06
 I found the www.milkleg.com website finally and read through everything last night. What amazing kids they are.
 I say are because I believe they are watching over us all. Thank you for sharing as you have done.
 I know you touch many people. You have me.


 From: Jacquie (mom)
 11/14/06
 Hey Cody.  I miss you so much today.  I don't know why but lately I've really been thinking about you a lot.
 Just wanted you to know that.  I love you.  Mom


 From: Tom
11/07/06
 I visit occasionally to reflect and to celebrate life. The pages here are an inspiration and reminder to me that our losses,
 our separation from our loved ones is only as real as our memories and thoughts allow!
Thank you for showing such love and devotion to us all.

 From:  Karyn
11/07/06
 Rachel and Cody made a difference, they touched everyone that they came in contact with......
 just as this website continues to do. Thank you for sharing.....wishing you many blessings

 From:  Tom C.
 9/26/06
 I have never thought that anything can be so humbling. My love is with you.
 Rachel is an angel

 From:  Jacquie (mom)
 9/18/06
 Hey.  I think of you both so much.  Cody, I went by our house where you lived as a little boy
 and the memories of you and M running around, playing in the yard, came back so vividly.  
 I still remember the day when you were probably about 2 1/2 and you proudly brought to show
 me a little snail that crept along the palm of your hand.  You held it so tenderly and were
 so proud to show me.  I'm glad I have that memory of you imprinted in my mind and heart.  
 They will always be there.  So much love to you, Mom

 From:  Patty
 9/11/06
 Hey Cody, I have just been thinking about you a lot lately.
 I wish I could talk to you, I need some of your perspective.
 I Love you and miss you always.

From:  Grandma Nita
8/24/06
Rachel honey, I found this quote to add to our
garden of memories ..."What is lovely never dies,
But passes into other loveliness,
Stardust, or sea foam, flower or winged air." [Aldrich]

The garden is a work in progress. I know you will like
the chain of blue butterflies.  I `m planting some bulbs
that will have blue flowers in the spring. For Cody,
reddish-orange seems the perfect color. I `m hoping
you will guide me in making the choices.
Love Always

From: Karen
8/24/06
I stumbled across your website today and almost
instantly became addicted. I believe I have read
every word and seen every picture. I had never heard
of them before. I only wish I had known them too. It
would be amazing to know an angel that walked this
earth. You must be amazing parents.

Karen

 

From: Shari
8/17/06
One... I know I couldn't say a single word that can take your pain away or go back in time. I so deeply wish there was with all my heart. I think it is so wonderful that you have done something productive, encouraging, and positive with such a sad situation. That is very admirable!
Two... I didn't mean to come across the site on Rachel and Cody... I was just looking for pictures on Google of art and love that I could put on my My space page and I found it. I honestly have to say, it was the most beautiful, humbling, and eye-opening mistake I've ever made. At first, I didn't know the story... I saw the art. I saw that it said Rachel Wicks on the bottom of all them and I felt like I should know her because of how much she made me think of myself actually. All the diff. pictures are things that I would put together if I had that strong of a talent. So I clicked around some more hoping to find a way to send her an e-mail. And then I saw the story. I bawled through the entire thing. You have an amazing way of writing that really made me feel like I knew both of your families.

Three... Rachel and Cody are people I would have loved to know. And in a way, everyone who never got a chance to know them, can now through your site. I've been sooooo depressed before and I've thought about taking my life. It's such a difficult thing to actually write out and tell someone. I'm doing good now, but reading their story, it really makes you appreciate life. It's not fair that the people who love life get it taken away. I sent a posting out to all the people on my My space and I'm sharing your site with everyone I know. It's amazing how many people this can touch and make realize how beautiful and fulfilling music, life, and art is. Thank you so much for sharing your story, for sharing their talents and making your children live on through this
God Bless
My love always,
Shari

From: Dirk
8/17/06
 Hello from Germany,
found your site tonight on my sleepless "walk" in the internet. It does not happen that often, that I have to cry while i am reading or watching something. But the story you wrote on your site hit me right into my heart. I am really sorry, that you lost your daughter and her friend.

I don't know, why i am writing to you, ´cause I think there's no way to give some comfort (is that the right word ?) to you, but I have two kids and I think, the most terrible thing can happen to me is to loose one of them. So, i hope you learned to life with that pain and keep your kids in real good memory. For me it was really good to see that there are people out there which are not that blunted and show their love and their pain.

The music of Rachel and Cody is really really good. She had an awesome voice. I like it. Hope a lot of people will hear that music and keep it into their hearts, like I do.

I wish you all the best and keep your daughter and her friend alive in your hearts and mind.

I am really sorry for the bad english , but I had to write you and it's late.

Keep on
Dirk

From: Mike
8/16/06
 Hiya, my name is mike and I live in Plymouth in the UK.
Not sure what to say but I was very touched to read about Rachel and Cody, I would've liked them.

 

 From: Heather
 Date:  6/4/06
Here with me or elsewhere, where ever, you're still helping me through tough things...
I know Asher is with you now, take good care of my baby for me, okay?
I love you, both of you, forever.

happy birthday Cody, we love you 
 

From:  Charlie
7/27/06
So sad for the lost of Rachel and Cody. I love their music and my heart goes out to the family and friends and all. Yours, Charlie

 

From: Aunt Lisa
Date: 5/29/06
Dearest Rach and Cody,
In recent weeks I lost, from this planet at least, a very close and dear friend. At his "life celebration" as they so wonderfully referred to his funeral, I had many thoughts of both of you and my thoughts and experiences in the aftermath of your departure from this world. This, at least initially, created a struggle for me until I came upon "The Act of Dying" in a book I've owned for quite some time. Funny how we pick things up at a time when the message can be so helpful and bring so much clarity. Stephen Levine writes; "how it is to die" - A sense of lightening, an expanding, a floating free. For some it takes a single seamless sigh, for others it is a more gradual ascension. Either way works. Both astound the heart with unexpected joy, both get us where we are going. But an enormous irony separates the dying from the living--a mirror effect in space. Things are not what they appear. Each stage of the body shutting down liberates something from within. Each outer manifestation of death is accompanied by an increasingly expansive aliveness within. In dying, as in meditation, the deeper we go the less definable we become, and the more real we feel. Immobility is the first outer sign of death, but as the element of solidity dissolves, there is a sense of being unbound as pain disappears into a new freedom of movement. It's like taking off a shoe that was too tight. Then the circulatory system closes down, as the fluid element withdraws into the departing life force, opening within a sense of increasing fluidity. A feeling of being more like an ocean than a boulder. The body cools as the fire element converges in the heart and exits through the top of the head. We sense a rising upward, like heat radiating from a sun struck highway. Lastly, the body becomes rigid and looks more like marble, than flesh as the air element disappears into space, as the lightness expands into something yet lighter. Passing beyond dying into death a sense of boundless expansion, of unlimited possibility, continues the
This was the first and only time I've ever read something so articulate about leaving this planet. It sounded beautiful, painless and like a journey to something far better and more beautiful than anything that exists on this planet. I feel so much more peace about where the both of you are, how you left this world and no longer struggle with the possibility that you may have suffered....I'm certain that you didn't. With all my love, today and forever.

From: Judy Sisk
Date: 5/24/06
Hello, my name is Judy, I was searching memorials this evening and came across Rachel & Cody`s site, They were truly two beautiful young and talented people. I am so sorry for your loss I know all to well the pain and heartache that parents/grandparents go through each and every day after the loss of a child/grandchild.
I lost my granddaughter to SIDS on Christmas Eve. 2002, her name was Ariauna she was 2 months old. Then on July 18th - 2003 my daughter Bobbi Jo ( Ariauna`s mommy ) was killed in a car accident, she was 20 years old. if you would like to meet my angels the link to there site is below my signature,
Thanks for sharing Rachel and Cody`s life,
         Judy Sisk
  
      www.bobbijosisk.com
     Gone from us in life
     Forever in our hearts
     Now in Gods hands
     Time can never erase
     The memory of your face

From: Aneyah 
Date:  5/21/06
I feel so sad about this :( The history of Rachel and Cody will be in my soul forever. These people make my life more valuable than I think. Rachel, Cody - I will  remember you. You are both heroes.

From:  Mom/Jacquie
Date:   5/15/06
Cody, Rachel, you were in our thoughts this Mother's Day. Love, Mom/Jacquie
 

From: David Goldblum
Date: 4/26/06

 I remember Rachel and Cody from my days in the trenches of Freebird's.  I could always count on Rachel being a warm dependable smile with a personality that was easily befriended.  I only recently was told that she and Cody had passed.  They will be greatly missed.

 
From: Jacquie
Date:  4/13/06
Subject: It's back!
Hey, the site is back up and running! So glad, so glad!


From: Heather
Date: 4/20/06
I still dream about you all the time, but now when I wake up I'm not as sad. I'm just glad that I have so many beautiful memories to dream about! I miss you and love you forever.

To Jacquie & family
From: Lisa - Rachel's Aunt
Date: 10 Apr 2005
Comments: Jacquie: I am certain that Cody was <and is> incredibly special to have held such a place in Rachel's life and heart. My sons, Dillon & Dustin, also took to him instantly and have very fond memories of the time they spent together in CO. As a mother, a person who loves Rachel and all those she loved, I express my deepest sympathy to you and your family. My thanks and appreciation to your daughter for creating that beautiful photo collage. She's given us all a wonderful keepsake. Your family is in my thoughts.

Re: To Jacquie & family
From:
Date: 11 Apr 2005
Comments: Lisa: Thank you for your kind, kind words. I always heard such wonderful things about you all and especially Dillon and Dustin. Your words help so very much, they really do. I hope some day to meet all of you, to put names with faces that I heard so much about during the years past. Take care and thank you again. Your words touched me.

to the Kinchloe's
From: Cody's Mom
Date: 14 Apr 2005
Comments: Tony: Thank you so much for writing these wonderful words. I realize you wrote them some time ago but I still wanted to let you know how helpful they are. Cody so benefited from your family's friendship and I remember so many wonderful stories of their antics and the time they spent together. I know Rachel as well enjoyed so much the time spent with Derek and Anthony especially. Cody talked so much about you and your sons and he really admired you so very much. I remember the good time he had when they went to the Tool concert with you I think and he just raved about the concert and spending time with you all. I always admired your sons, though until recently I had not met Michael. You have raised three very fine young men. And I am so very happy that Cody was blessed to have you all in his life. And as you know, when people bless our children's lives, we are in turn well blessed and happy to see their happiness and joy. I know Cody and Rachel are in the best place but I know we all miss them too. But sharing memories with friends such as yourselves, helps us so much. I go to it regularly and always enjoy reading what others have written and posting my messages or responses. Thank you for sharing your feelings. Any time you in town, please feel free to stop by and please tell Derek and Anthony, we said hello. They are welcome to come by any time.

Time passes
From: Jacquie
Date: 23 Apr 2005
Comments: I guess I'm the only one writing today. Friday marked three months. I can't believe it's been three months. It is such a short period of time yet it is an eternity....

my friends, the kids
From: dale ( dad )
Date: 24 Apr 2005
Comments: I have wept in the shower... sat numbly for hours.... engaged in this walk... had enough of the talk... for my thoughts have left this plane. So you've moved on ,well, us too.... our affections direct where we go to.... Now we watch everyday.... on this path we shall stay.... for our comfort and  bread... is eternal life's way. The rest is illusion.... to cleave is confusion... why is it we must  lose our loves..... to come to this conclusion

This brought me comfort
From: Mom Jacquie
Date: 26 Apr 2005
Comments: This brought me comfort this morning as I drove to work and so I wanted to share with others from Romans 8:25-28 KJV. I hope it helps others on this sad journey. 25 But if we hope for that we see not, then do we with patience wait for it. 26 Likewise the Spirit also helpeth our infirmities: for we know not what we should pray for as we ought: but the Spirit itself maketh intercession for us with groanings which cannot be uttered. 27 And he that searcheth the hearts knoweth what is the mind of the Spirit, because he maketh intercession for the saints according to the will of God. 28 And we know that all things work together for good to them that love God, to them who are the called according to his purpose.

hey guys.
From: Patty
Date: 27 Apr 2005
Comments: Dear dear Cody, Its been three months, and it seems like an eternity. i feel as if i have a cody shaped hole in my heart that nothing can fill. but i know you are watching us all. and i know whenever i cry i can hear your voice sayin "dude dont cry, please dude..." as you said to me so many times. I know you are proud of me for all the things i have accomplished. and i know you are raggin on me for all the stupid things i have done lately too. i just miss you my friend. And Rachael, sweet girl, i didnt know you all that well, but from what i knew you were an amazing person, and are so missed. I know you were very special, because Cody loved you so much. I know you two are having a blast in heaven. And i am so comforted that you have each other. I love you.

 Dear Cody & Rachel
From: Katrina
Date: 27 Apr 2005
Comments: Dear Cody & Rachel, today at school we saw a reenactment of a car crash that was supposed to prevent us from drunk driving on prom night. it made me so sad to think that if that was real the horror their parents would feel as the same horror i felt with having to hear that both of you had passed. i miss you both so much. i miss not hearing little rachie's laugh and my friend jeanette told me the other day that she seemed like such a happy, nice person. i miss that i will never feel cody's bony little body when i hug him. i dont think i can ever go back to fudruckers and copy corner, because i know id miss not seeing cody turn around with the biggest smile on his face. i know you guys are happy together, i just wish i could see you and talk with you more. i saw your wrecksite when we went to colorado and put the card i sent you but you never got at it, cody. maybe ill get to tell you what i said on it soon. not to drag it on more, so i will end with this. a poster i have says "a thing of beauty never dies. it will never pass to nothingness, it's beauty will just increase." for you both, i feel the same. peace and hair grease, kat

Re: Dear Cody & Rachel
From: Jacquie
Date: 10 May 2005
Comments: I like what you said here. I had to go to Copy Corner the other day for work and it was really hard, I kept expecting to see Cody. And one of the student groups here changed their dinner plans from Fuddruckers to Chilis because they knew how difficult it would be for us. I will always remember Cody's grin as he turned around to look at me and how proud he was to make something special for us. Cody, Rachel, you are so missed. We love you both. Jacquie

I wish you could come back
From: Katrina
Date: 05 May 2005
Comments: I miss you guys so much.

Re: I wish you could come back
From: Jacquie
Date: 10 May 2005
Time: 15:20:58 -0400
Remote Name: 165.91.130.105
Comments: I miss them too so much.

Wanted to say hi
From: Niki
Date: 07 May 2005
Comments: Dale, Darnell... I just wanted to stop in and say hello to you. Hope things are going well for you since your move. Miss seeing you at Mead Street. We keep in touch with Boyd a lot. Miss Cody and Rachel at MSS more than you could imagine. The pictures on the site only remind me of their tremendous spunk and vitality. We miss them so much. I promise that one day, they'll be remembered in a song. I promise. Keep in touch! -Niki kickercole@hotmail.com www.nikijenewein.com

Re: Wanted to say hi
From: Cody's mom
Date: 10 May 2005
Comments: Niki: You wrote that you missed Cody and Rachel at MSS. I'd love to hear more about what you remember, any funny stories or just remembrances. They help keep them close. I am having a terribly missing Cody day today as his mom and just past mother's day. If you ever do write a song about them, please let me know. We’d love to hear it. I miss Cody so much; it's hard to go from day to day. It’s hard to believe even now that Cody and Rachel aren’t here any longer. I'm sorry we never got to meet you and some of their other friends when we visited Cody and Rachel and then after they passed away. That last trip to Colorado a week after their passing was a tough trip to see the site of the accident, but we got to reconnect with Dale and Darnell and share our grief and loss. Thanks, Jacquie

miss you
From: heather
Date: 18 May 2005
Comments: life has been really hard since cody and rachie left us, but this morning i realized for the first time that in so many ways, they are still with us. every time i want to call my sid for advice, i can hear his voice in my head telling me stop being a baby and just figure it out, or that its going to be okay, or whatever i need him to say. he helped me through every hard time before, and i realized that its stupid to think that he isn't still helping, even if only from my memories. thanks for all the years of support...

miss you guys
From: katrina
Date: 05 Jun 2005
Comments: My mom and I were talking about ya'll both last night and it makes me miss you.

Re: miss you guys
From: darnell
Date: 06 Jun 2005
Comments: katrina, i know the feeling. i miss them so much. never a day goes by that my heart does not long for them. i know it's the same for your family. wish there was something i could do. cody, rachel what an impact you left on our lives. love you katrina!!!!!!

Re: miss you guys
From: Jacquie
Date: 08 Jun 2005
Comments: Amen to both of your postings. The world was a better place for their having been in it, but a much sadder place for their leaving. Though I know they are in a much better place, it is still a struggle to go day to day without them. Peace to all who visit this site. Love, Jacquie

All of the above
From: Alex/Munkie
Date: 17 Jun 2005
Comments: For a while I didn't really believe they were gone...not really. It was at Codys funeral that I finally realized it was true. All I could think about was how much fun we had at their going away party. I haven't posted here before, but I have been coming here often since the accident. I found that for the first month or so I couldn't get past the first few pages of pictures. It was to much emotion all at once, and I would have to do something else. Then one day I got to a picture with Cody fixing my mohawk, and it looked so strange, I had to laugh. I'm writing this whole thing to say "Don't cry because it's over, smile because it happened" I'm glad they happened. I'm glad I got to be a part of their lives. I think Cody and Rachel are the only friends I ever had that I didn't exchange harsh words with. The world was and always will be a better place because of them. I wish I could have had time to say that to their faces.

Re: All of the above
From: dale
Date: 17 Jun 2005
Comments: I'm sure the kids know and appreciate your love for them.

Re: All of the above
From: Jacquie
Date: 19 Jun 2005
Comments: I agree with what Dale wrote and would like to add that I always heard them talk about you so much. I used to wonder who this "munkie" was that they talked about:-) I believe they counted you as a good friend. Thank you for posting and for sharing. I want to start a video log of their friends who would like to just talk about them, share funny stories, etc. If you know of anyone from their group of friends who might be interested in just sharing and laughing about good times, please let me know. When I get it finished I want to share it with Rachie's parents, my daughters, other family members, anyone else who would like to enjoy the remembrances. You all seem to have been a very close-knit and large group of friends here in B/CS. I'd like to keep in touch. Cody's mom

I remember Rachel
From: Neil Zimmerman of Pairadeux
Date: 21 Jun 2005
Comments: I met Rachel & her mom over at Mead St. Station last year. My partner Elizabeth & I were performing; at the time we also hosted several Open Mics. Rachel & her mom were watching us, and someone introduced me. We talked for a bit; I tried to coax Rachel up to play but she said she wasn't ready...something about waiting for Cody to arrive in Denver so she'd have the whole band. I ended up writing down a list of Open Mics where they could play & get some exposure. I was struck by how shy she seemed, but yet that wasn't how she looked....she had this sort of furry boa thing wrapped around her, and looked every bit the rock star. And radiating out from this rock-star outfit was this stunningly beautiful face. I saw her play during another Mead St. visit, and I thought she really sang & played well. I was truly saddened by her passing. May she rest in peace and the music, art and vibes she spread to all she touched reverberate forever. --Neil Z. of Pairadeux http://www.pairadeux.com

Re: I remember Rachel
From: darnell
Date: 21 Jun 2005
Comments: thanks for your post neil and all the kind words. i remember you also and hope you are doing well.

rachels cousin brittany
From: darnell
Date: 21 Jun 2005
Comments: looks like our family has suffered another tragedy. rachels cousin brittany the same age as our kids who suffered their own tragedy. had an accident and broke her neck. she is not doing very well. at this point she is on a ventilator and a quad. this for someone as active and full of life as cody and rachel were is heart breaking. her mom is trying to hang in there with all the stress. which after going through this just recently, it takes a lot out of you. so i wanted to ask all of you who gave us so much support and love to remember brittany and her mom in your prayers. thank you

Re: rachels cousin brittany
From: Katrina
Date: 21 Jun 2005
Comments: My mom told me about this. I'm really, really, really sorry. I know it doesn't do much, seeing as I'd always feel the same way when someone told me that, but I know Cody & Rachel are watching her, looking down from Heaven with God. As I say this, Joyce is rolling around on the floor, it always makes me smile to see her because I think of when Cody put her little spikey collar on and she was running around with it on, or Rachel saying "she puts her little cat butt up in my face!" when we were eating at a chinese place in colarado. Ya'll are in my prayers, and so is Britney's family, it's a shame I never got to meet her. Love you Darnell & Dale.

Re: rachels cousin brittany
From: darnell
Date: 21 Jun 2005
Comments: thank you katrina. i think about you all the time and how much cody loves you. i love you, darnell

Re: rachels cousin brittany
From: Jacquie
Date: 22 Jun 2005
Comments: Darnell please relay to Brittany's mom how sorry we are and that we are holding them all in our prayers. I know how much it meant to me during the loss of the kids when I knew people were lifting us up in prayer. It gives some comfort. Please tell her this. Kat thinks she may have come across a photo of Brittany in Cody's album but we're not sure. Also, for those reading Kat's post and maybe wondered who Joyce is, Joyce was Cody's cat, who became Cody and Rachel's cat I think:-) We love you, Jacquie

missing you
From: Patty
Date: 30 Jun 2005
Comments: I miss you guys. Cody i know you are watching over me. and i thank you for it. I could use some of your guiding words though. i have 2 Cody stories to share. I do believe they are trying to help us all heal. The 1st one was on my birthday, I was really thinking of him alot and really missing him bc he wasnt going to be there on my birthday. My mom took some friends and i out to this place we took Cody and the Vargas's one time, he loved it. and after we sat down my mom told me to turn around, and when i did I saw the most adorable red haired little boy, and i knew that Cody sent him to show me that he was there with me celebrating. The 2nd one was that my mom gave me a book to read about a boy who was killed in a car accident. and how his family coped with it. I cried through the whole book. I read it all in one night. The way I woke up the next morning was that i felt someone pat my head. I startled and looked around thinking it was my mom, but there was no one there. I know it was Cody letting me know he was there. For everyone hurting and missing them, look for the signs. They are showing us they are here with us when we need them. My love and prayers to all. -Patty Ashcraft

Re: missing you
From: heather
Date: 01 Jul 2005
Comments: I know just what you mean... A few weeks ago, I was really down, missing them, and I couldn't sleep. (Jaquie, remember how I used to come over and go to sleep?) Well, i felt someone grab my hand. At first I thought it was my boyfriend, But it wasn't. I suddenly thought, what if it's Sid? I then heard a voice saying, "Of course it's me, don't be stupid. You always slept good when I was with you, so I figured I'd come and help." I thought for a second that I was imagining it, from missing him so much, and I felt him wrap me up the way he used to (purely platonic, just for the record!) and I could smell him. Everone who knew him knows that smell... I wanted to tell him so much, give messages for Rachie, and he said, "We both know that you love us, we love you too. Go to sleep." So I did, and had the best nights sleep that I've had in months, if not years. Thank you, my Sid. I love you!!!!

4th of july
From: mom
Date: 04 Jul 2005
Comments: hey kids, i miss you so much, the holidays are not the same without you. i remember you and cody going down town denver last year to see fireworks. what excitement and joy you two had. oh my God i miss you. i love you both. be free, mom

Re: 4th of july
From: J Mom
Date: 05 Jul 2005
Comments: The same wishes go for me as well. We had a quiet July 4th just remembering. Aunt M passed away on June 26 and we were told that her best friend passed away 15 minutes later. Tomorrow is Kat's birthday and then comes Cody's in a couple of weeks. It will not be the same I know. It's going to be really hard for her tomorrow but know that we'll be thinking of you as we celebrate her birthday. I know you'll be there in our thoughts and our hearts; you always are there. Maybe you all will be celebrating it too where you are. We miss you so much but when you think about it, each day brings us closer to being together again as a family. As I write this though I realize we still are a family, we're just not all in the same place. We love you and miss you both, J Mom

My last first true friend
From: Cedar
Date: 11 Jul 2005
Comments: My memories of rachie can not be explained. She was my first real friend, and sad to say, my last. I have missed her, and thought of her more and more with each passing day. She was a blessing to me when I was a lost child with no one to talk to. Her family took me in as if i was their own. I will not soon forget the impact that they had on my life. I thank god every day that i was blessed to know her.

cody's birthday
From: darnell
Date: 19 Jul 2005
Comments: cody, i want to send you and your family my love on your earth birthday. to this day it is so hard to believe you and rachel are not here physically. i know you are here in spirit and i hope you and rachel will celebrate this day with us. i miss you so much. i miss your smile and gentle way. peace to you, your mom and sisters. i will always love you, darnell

Birthday
From: heather
Date: 20 Jul 2005
Comments: Happy birthday, Sid! Give kisses all around for me, I love you forever and I miss you.

Happy birthday Cody!
From: Kat
Date: 20 Jul 2005
Comments: Happy birthday! I wish you were here to tell you, but I can't. I hope you guys are having a good time up there - or wherever you are. :)

Article 99
From:
Date: 21 Jul 2005
Comments: HB

heyhey
From: chris the barefoot wanderer
Date: 22 Jul 2005
Comments: i was searching through the posts, and i had thought i'd posted something a while back, but i guess i didn't, so i want to post now. i just wanted to say hi, and i miss you guys...crazy punks ;)

one more thing
From: chris
Date: 22 Jul 2005
Comments: i'd just like to say, cody and rachel were great people. they influenced everyone they knew, and the world, very positively. we're all better people for knowing those two. i was showing someone who had never known or seen cody and rachel their pictures, and without really knowing anything about them, they said, "wow, they look like amazing people." that made me smile, and i hope it makes you smile too, knowing that just by looking at their pictures, one can already know cody and rachel were great and amazing people.

Re: one more thing
From: Cody's Mom
Date: 02 Aug 2005
Comments: Chris: thanks for words about the kids. I miss them so much. It's hard to believe that 6 months have gone by without my hearing Cody's voice or his laughter. They were blessed to have such wonderful friends and people in their lives.

I know its late...
From: Patty
Date: 26 Jul 2005
Comments: Happy Birthday sweet Cody! Im missing you as much as ever. You would be proud of me, I finally got my tattoo on your birthday. its a pretty good sized one at that. You always said you would take me to get my 1st tattoo, so since you couldnt...I knew to go on your birthday, because you would be there in spirit. I got an infinity like yours. i decided a few days after you left us to get it. To me its a memorial of a truly amazing person who i will never forget, and who will be with my infinitely. Its a neat blue thats very serene, like you, a calming factor. I know you were there watching me and laughing whenever i made a face cuz it hurt. lol. Bryan and Jason came with me, and they each got one too as a reminder of you. Kinda neat, and your mom and Kat were there too. gotta run, but im sending you all my love. --Patty--

a thought
From: a loved one
Date: 07 Aug 2005
Comments: "maybe we'll take off our opaque glasses and see past these jars of clay, maybe, just maybe on some wondrous day. Your beautiful just as you are....truly beautiful" by Rachel. You two were and are beautiful, may we see beyond the physical this same beauty in ourselves, what makes us one and eternally connects us with you.

Re: a thought
From: Jacquie/Mom
Date: 08 Aug 2005
Comments: This was very lovely. Thank you for sharing this.

We miss you
From: J
Date: 12 Aug 2005
Comments: Hi today. We miss you. And wish you were here to talk to, to laugh with, to dream with, to be. Blessings where you are and we hope to be.

96 messages
From: Jacquie
Date: 15 Aug 2005
Comments: Wow, there have been 96 postings to-date on this web site. Kids, that's 96 messages that folks have written about you, to you, for you. You touched so many lives and so many hearts. 96 messages ~ 6 1/2 months. It seems like an eternity yet also just yesterday. Peace and love to you.

7 months
From: Patty
Date: 22 Aug 2005
Comments: Wow you two, its been seven months today. I love you as much as ever, And I miss you more than that.

Re: 7 months
From:
Date: 23 Aug 2005
Comments: It's hard to believe it's been 7 months; it seems like an eternity and then again it seems like only yesterday. Oh and by the way Cody, Joyce is doing well:-)

missing you
From: darnell (mom)
Date: 05 Sep 2005
Comments: i miss you two so much!!! my house is not a home without your laughter. rachel, your dad painted the most beautiful painting today that says it all. rachel, cody, i love you always, darnell, mom

Cody's Cousin Rachel
From: Jacquie
Date: 07 Sep 2005
Comments: Cody's cousin Rachel from Colorado was in a traffic accident along with her boyfriend but they both came out ok. Shaken up and bruised from the air bags but other than that, ok. We don't need to lose anyone else.

miss you guys
From:
Date: 09 Sep 2005
Comments: it gets lonely here...i know we'll be with you sooner or later, its just seems so long :(

Re: miss you guys
From: Jacquie
Date: 14 Sep 2005
Comments: Whoever wrote this, I agree with you.

food for thought
From: J
Date: 19 Sep 2005
Comments: The best and most beautiful things cannot be seen or touched - they must be felt with the heart ~ Helen Keller Happy moments, praise God. Difficult moments, seek God. Quiet moments, worship God. Painful moments, trust God. Every moment, thank God.

always on my mind
From: mom (darnell)
Date: 22 Sep 2005
Comments: cody, rachel, you are never forgotten for one moment. you are always on my mind and always will be. the 22nd of every month is such a hard reminder of your absence for all of us left here on earth. i love you, mom (darnell)

Re: always on my mind
From: heather
Date: 24 Sep 2005
Comments: Exactly... How could you go even one minute wihtout thinking about them? I miss them every day more and more.

Re: always on my mind
From: mom (jacquie)
Date: 26 Sep 2005
Comments: It is unbearable at times. I miss you so much.

Re: Always on my mind
From: Patty
Date: 26 Sep 2005
Comments: I miss them too. I know what you mean about every 22nd being hard. every time it rolls around I seem to feel a dark cloud over me. I dont think theres a day yet that they havent crossed my mind. I love and miss you.

from japan kind words
From: erichs email
Date: 13 Oct 2005
Comments:
wow. i am so sorry. my name is erich, and i only had the pleasure to know them for a short time before i left denver for japan. i thought that they were both very wonderful and i admired their drive and spirit very much. at a time when i was slacking on my own musical output, being around them inspired me to focus and start recording music again. i have a copy of their album, and i really think it is amazing, ezpecially for people so young. i am very sad to hear this news. i am in japan now, but i have a lot of pictures from my digital camera here with me. i am not sure if i have any pictures of them with me here, but if i do, would you like them? please take care. if you could use a laugh, you might find my blog funny. http://www.meatleg.com/meatblog/ i have kind of an outlandish, whining writing style, but i believe it is the kind of humor that rachel and cody shared in our friendship. erich fleischbein

subconcious
From:
Date: 14 Oct 2005
Comments: i dream about you every night, and i wake up sad but joyful that you are still in my subconscious, still leading me forward into whatever. i miss you and it leaves me sorrowful but grateful that i have had enough of you to miss. i want to look back at the times we had, the three of us young and curious, but i have to look ahead and live a new frightening life without you, my best friends. i want to refuse, to stay sad, to stay angry, but how sad and angry would you be at me if i did? so i try to move on but stay still with my memories of our lives together holding my head up with nothing but the strength you taught me. i can do it, i can live with out you, because you are always with me, if only in my subconscious... i love you forever

I love you forever too
From:
Date: 20 Oct 2005
Comments: I read the entry titled "subconscious" and to echo the last line - I love you forever too. Jacquie/Mom

Miss you
From: EAA
Date: 20 Oct 2005
Comments: I cannot believe we are going to be going through the holidays in a few weeks. It will be difficult, the first few years always are. Everyone is so festive and happy and when you have lost someone, you just don't feel like celebrating. You do good to just "get through" and "move on". Even though you were away last year for the holidays, we could still call and hear your laugh. And I know you were were you wanted to be. And even though you missed your family in Texas, you were with Rachel and her family and you were happy. Gosh, Cody, I miss your grin, your wit, your love and you so much.

happy halloween
From: heather
Date: 31 Oct 2005
Comments: HAppy halloween, guys, and everyone else...

Re: happy halloween
From: Jacquie
Date: 02 Nov 2005
Comments: Here's wishing you a good one too!

Article 147
From:
Date: 01 Nov 2005
Comments: bonjour, je suis française et je viens de découvrir ton site par hasard. je voulais te dire que c'est magnifique ce que tu fais. ... hello, i'm french and i'm discovering your website. i wanted to tell you that it's marvellous what you do!

Miss you
From: Mom
Date: 03 Nov 2005
Comments: We miss you Cody, so much. We are somehow making it through, but it so hard, for each of us individually and collectively. In a recent dream, I dreamt you hugged me as you used to and I draw comfort now from that image in my mind and heart. We love you. Mom

For Good
From: Patty
Date: 03 Nov 2005
Comments: I saw Wicked The Musical last night, it was phenomenal. The next to last song stuck with me. I cried through most of it. This is for my sweet lost friend... I've heard it said That people come into our lives for a reason Bringing something we must learn And we are led To those who help us most to grow If we let them And we help them in return Well, I don't know if I believe that's true But I know I'm who I am today Because I knew you: Like a comet pulled from orbit As it passes a sun Like a stream that meets a boulder Halfway through the wood Who can say if I've been changed for the better? But because I knew you I have been changed for good It well may be That we will never meet again In this lifetime So let me say before we part So much of me Is made of what I learned from you You'll be with me Like a handprint on my heart And now whatever way our stories end I know you have re-written mine By being my friend: Like a ship blown from its mooring By a wind off the sea Like a seed dropped by a skybird In a distant wood Who can say if I've been changed for the better? But because I knew you: Because I knew you: I have been changed for good And just to clear the air I ask forgiveness For the things I've done you blame me for But then, I guess we know There's blame to share And none of it seems to matter anymore Like a comet pulled Like a ship blown From orbit as it Off it's mooring Passes a sun, like By a wind off the A stream that meets Sea, like a seed A boulder, half-way Dropped by a Through the wood Bird in the wood Who can say if I've been changed for the better? I do believe I have been changed for the better? And because I knew you: Because I knew you: Because I knew you: I have been changed for good. "For Good" from WICKED I love and miss you Cody.

Holidays
From: Patty
Date: 16 Nov 2005
Comments: As the holidays are fast approaching I cant help think about you guys, and how we are all going to make it through without you here this thanksgiving and Christmas. My heart breaks everytime I think about it. Cody, all I can think about when I think about thanksgiving is the year we did it together. Remember how crazy that was! That is probably one of my best holiday memories. It was actually cold that year, Cody and I planned to cook for everyone that year. We planned for weeks, and had a blast planning our menu and shopping. The day of was crazy, we were up and I dont know when, but it was early. We cooked ALL day. It was great. I love and miss you so much. I know you guys will be here in spirit this year, but you will be missed with all my heart.

Thinking of You
From: J Mom
Date: 23 Nov 2005
Comments: Well, it's been a year since we last saw each other face to face but you've never left my heart or my thoughts. You'll be in all our thoughts and hearts as we go in to the Thanksgiving holiday. You'll be with us as we gather together and share our thanks and blessings. You are a supreme blessing. Know that we love you and hold you close. Cody, Rachel, we miss you. With love.

Re: Thinking of You
From: mom (darnell)
Date: 26 Nov 2005
Comments: thanksgiving will never be the same without you. it was so lonely without you two. it's still so hard to believe that we can't just sit down and talk and laugh together. you are missed by so many. our lives are forever changed. you are in my thoughts every moment. i love you rachel and cody. mom (darnell)

Re: Thinking of You
From: Jacquie
Date: 28 Nov 2005
Comments: Darnell is so right. One of the hardest things is not being able to just sit down and talk like we did so many times. See your smiles and hear your laughter. One day we will again. Love you and miss you Cody and Rachel. Jacquie (mom)

beautiful site
From: jasper
Date: 27 Nov 2005
Comments: I just looked on the internet for pictures, and came on this site. I just looked at the pictures and was so impressed how happy both were. It is late at night in a very cold place in the north of germany and after I saw this pictures I felt I know both for years. I felt so sorry for you after I read this letter that tears came down my face. I found it is a very beautiful way to build this size. Wish you best Jasper

cold in austin
From: Heather
Date: 07 Dec 2005
Comments: Today is the first day it's felt like winter here, and I was thinking about a cold day in c/s when I didnt have a jacket. Cody and Rachie spent the day coming up with new and unusual ways to keep warm. My personal favorite was the hula hoop contest, which I still think would've worked great, had we had a hula hoop... or one of them could've lent me a coat...

forever missing you
From: mom (darnell)
Date: 11 Dec 2005
Comments: hey kids, this year has been so strange. i went to a get together tonight with friends. the fact that you two were missing was heart breaking. i miss you both so much. i could scream. time doesn't heal it just makes me realize how long you've been gone. i want to tell everyone about how great you made my life. you two could never be replaced. i want to thank you cody for loving me. i want to thank you rachel for being my child,loving and caring so much for me. where would i have been all those christmas's riding back from houston with out you two. i just don't have the words to say how i feel. you made my life complete and i love you both. may God help us all who are left here with this horrible gap. i love you guys. please have a wonderful time where you are. love mom darnell

January.
From: Heather
Date: 13 Dec 2005
Comments: January is really creeping up, isn't it? I can't believe that it has almost been a year... It still doesn't feel real, much less that it happened a year ago. I miss you and love you forever.

Re: January.
From: Jacquie / Mom
Date: 15 Dec 2005
Comments: It is hard to believe it's been almost a year. It still doesn't seem real at times. I have been meaning to give you my e-mail so that when you're in town again or if we're ever up your way, we can stay in touch. It's zaan_99@yahoo.com.

Hi
From: Holly W.
Date: 16 Dec 2005
Comments: Hello, my name is Holly. I was looking for some pictures and I saw the amazing art work done by Rachel. She is truely a talented person. I started looking around the site and I read about them and looked at their pictures. And I feel like I have known them for years. I felt an instant connection through her poetry, and her songs...I just saw myself in her! Ever since I was little I always dreamed of being a musician, of writting and making music. And reading about Rachel and Cody has truly inspired me. I am so sorry for your loss, I truly am. I know it must be difficult. Although Im sure they are looking down on us right now, and smiling the big smiles everyone seemed to love. =) I wish I could have had the honor of knowing Rachel and Cody, I'm sure they could have taught me a lot. I hope they rest in peace, and you are all in my prayers. With Love, Holly W.

Re: Hi
From: Jacquie/Mom
Date: 16 Dec 2005
Comments: Hi and thank you for your wonderful comments. They were two fine young people who shouldn't have left us so early in their young lives. But I like what you said about their smiling down on us. Their smiles endeared them to so many and their warmth and spirit gave so much happiness. They are watching and smiling down on us even now. Cody's Mom

Sirius-ly missing you
From: D2-Dave Lierman (of Conspiracy Assassins) former founding member of Kill Syndicate)
Date: 20 Dec 2005
Comments:I visit this website every time I need to smile, or just to visit with friends again. Rachel practiced with my former band so she could make a guest appearance with us at the Gothic, with Scum of the Earth, and Dog Fashion Disco. She was so incredible!! I was drowning in her eyes the first time I met her! And as we played her voice was just incredible!! Now she knows who I am! I might have fooled you when I logged in on the post! Ha ha. Rachel and Cody, I miss you so much, I was looking forward to years of intelligent conversation, and a Co-D2 (Cody and D2) jam band. Cody-2, we'll work out the name later. See...now I have to haul all of my bass gear up to you guys someday! I see how it works. I regret that night I didn't get to hang out with you guys. We had the most incredible conversation, a lot of discussion about the Sirius star, and so much, (I'm typing this so people reading it will understand, I talk to you two everyday) but since my son was sick, and my wife was pregnant, you know all that was going on, the three of us didn't get to go hang out. But I guess you two have all the answers now, so it's still just me in the dark, missing you, with all the same questions we were pondering then. I just wanted to thank your parents for keeping this site up and running, this is so amazing. It means so much to me to be able to see friends I miss no matter where I am. As a parent I can't imagine how hard every day must be. My sons are 1 and 3 now, and it's unbearable if I spend a day away from them. You are beautiful people, paying tribute to beautiful people. And the love, and smiles that these snapshots of time show, are not only a memorial to Rachel and Cody, but the love that they shared with the parents who keep this running. Thanks to you for keeping this site up.

Re: Sirius-ly missing you
From: Jacquie
Date: 22 Dec 2005
Comments: I am at work as I read your message and I want to say how much I appreciate your comments. I'm Cody's mom and there are so many of Cody and Rachel's friends I never got the chance to meet in person but I feel like I get to "meet" you all through the site. Losing a child is I guess the worst thing I've ever had to deal with and like most folks, I've had my share of sadness and tough times so on the scale of tough things to go through, this has been the toughest. But I love what you wrote and like you, I think Darnell, Dale and I all talk to the kids each day. I know they are in a wonderful place but it's so hard not having them here with us in physical form. I know their spirits shine brightly.

Re: Sirius-ly missing you
From: dale ( rachel's dad )
Date: 20 Dec 2005
Comments: Your words made Darnell and I smile...thanks.

website
From: whitney
Date: 22 Dec 2005
Comments: I found the Milkleg site by mistake looking for a notebook paper background for my website. I found a poem of your daughter's that reminded me alot of my poetry. Normally, I don't pay attention to the website displayed below the picture, but for some reason I did, and spent about forty-five minutes just looking around it, and I got all teary-eyed reading what you wrote. I'm sorry for your loss, they both seemed like such wonderful, happy people. Much like the people I keep close to myself. Although they say time heals, I realize a big hole in your heart can never be completely filled, but I pray that you find all the happiness in the world and heal a little bit more everyday. I also want to be a musician, and after reading everything you had to say, I realized I better get started, and as soon as I am finished writing you this e-mail, rest assured that I will be playing my guitar. My prayers are with you. xWhitney

Merry Christmas!
From: Heather
Date: 26 Dec 2005
Comments: Merry Christmas, everyone! Hope a good time was had by all... I bet Christmas is a blast in the afterlife!

posted by Dale, a letter from Thomas
From: Thomas
Date: 31 Dec 2005
Comments: "I need to share something with you, and I hope it does not bring pain, but joy and contentment. I am a psychic, not the best, but manageable. I have had many experiences with seeing and communicating with spirits. I took a moment this morning to peruse the site about Rachael and Cody and experienced something I have not experienced before. Usually my contact with spirits are those that are still lingering for some reason or another, but today it was with two who have ascended beyond into the place that can truly not be described with words. Two spirits full of love, happiness and contentment with a message that all is well and all is as it should be. I have often found that my life is guided to meet people that need me in one way or another, people I can help with my many gifts, and I know this is one such time, to give you this added piece of mind. I am writing this in tears with the beauty that I felt from them, and the warmth that was pouring out. All is well and all is as it should be. "

Re: posted by Dale, a letter from Thomas
From: chris
Date: 03 Jan 2006
Comments: just a simple reply: that's beautiful, and a great thing to hear

A visit from Rachel
From: Julia
Date: 31 Dec 2005
Comments: While moving Dale and Darnell into their new place I walked into one room, set some paintings down and started out the door. All of a sudden I felt these arms go around me and Rachel spoke to me. She thanked me for loving her parents and being there for them. She said she and Cody were happy and having a blast flying everywhere and visiting. When they hugged me I felt the most powerful love surround me. I have never felt love so strong or so pure. It is impossible to describe it with words. It has taken me a while to be able to write this. I often have spirits talk to me from the other side, but this was the first time I had ever felt such a powerful feeling from any of them. I couldn't stop crying. Dale & Darnell thought I had hurt myself. All I could do was cry and enjoy the hug. It was such a beautiful experience for me. Rachel has visited a few more times and talked but I have not received any more hugs. I felt like writing this after Dale read me a comment from a psychic that had experienced the same love from them. I know Rachel & Cody are very happy. They always leave with I love you's.

a simple observation
From: chris
Date: 03 Jan 2006
Comments: i've known many people who've passed away in the past 5 years or so. some were close friends, and some were acquaintances. anyways, a soothing thought came to me the other day. i was in a conversation about tattoos with derek kinchloe. if you don't know, he's an apprentice and will hopefully one day be a tattoo artist. during that conversation, i remembered the tattoo cody had on his neck; the infinity symbol. for whatever reason he got that tattoo, it has now taken true meaning. he (and rachel) will be here with us forever. i'd like to continue on with what i'm saying, but i just can't find the words. but, i miss those guys. it's almost been a year...but they're still here with us

Thinking Of You (Guys) Tonight
From: An old friend
Date: 03 Jan 2006
Comments: I know that I am not the only one who knew you, and I know that I am not the only one who hurts. But I think about you all the time, and I can't help but to feel alone. Im not sure how to deal with you not being around anymore. I think about the day that I met you all the time, and how funny the way that we met is. I think about the things that we used to do, and the time that we spent together, and now I feel scared that I might someday forget these things. I try to think about them often, but I end up crying everytime that I do. I know that I sound silly, and like I can't live without you, I can, I just really wish that I did'nt have to. Everything here is so different without you. I feel so odd without you here, I worry about those that you have left behind. I know that there are many who have been left with a hole in their lives, and I just hope that they can find a way to heal those holes. Anyways I know that I am ramblin on, so I will let you get back to what ever it was that you were doing, but just know that I love you, and wish that you were here. I wish that I didnt have to write a letter on your memorial page to speak to you, but it is what it is, and I can deal with that. I will never forget you. Both of you. Love always, your friend, no need to sign, you know who I am, thats all that counts.

To All
From: Someone touched
Date: 04 Jan 2006
Comments: I just want to say how much I love reading the postings at this site. I have been and continue to be touched by everyone's words. I will continue to come here and visit, it helps keep me in touch with Cody and Rachel and all who loved and knew them. And that somehow makes missing them a little less painful. To all, peace.

From an old friend of Rachel's
From: Dave
Date: 06 Jan 2006
Comments: I was looking over my old cd collection when I ran across the burned copy of "For Those Without Dreams" that Rachel made for me almost two years ago. I met her when she first moved to Colorado. I was singing on Pearl St in Boulder, and she tipped me and we talked about song writing for awhile. She didn't have a lot friends in Colorado yet, so I took her around to some of the open mics, and we became pretty good friends. We would sit down by Boulder Creek sometimes and have impromptu song writing workshops that would usually turn into long philisophical discussions and therapy sessions for both of us. She was a really sweet girl, smart, sincere, with a great heart. Like me she was driven by her passion for music. It sounds cliche, but her voice was truly beautiful like an angel. It struck me down every time I heard her, and I couldn't help but feel like I was showing her off when I would bring her to clubs only to have the host turn to me in amazement and say "Goddamn, that girl has the most beautiful voice!" But as an artist she was smart and aware. A voice that beautiful had to be balanced by the darkness in their music to be a true reflection of the world. I moved away to New York only a few months after we met, and we lost contact. I just now googled Milkleg to maybe reconnect, say hi, see how she was doing with her music and everything (I always like to check on my artist friends every once in awhile to make sure they haven't given up their dreams and gotten real jobs). Running across your website instead was so sad and at first I couldn't believe what I was seeing. I'm so sorry for what you must have gone through. It is a loss to everyone who ever knew her, and anyone who might have ever heard her. She was truly special and an inspiration to those who knew her, and it is so unfortunate she couldn't reach more in her short time. I'm glad that she was with Cody, although it is even sadder the tragedy took both of them. I knew her before Cody moved up to meet her, but I know she loved him very much and talked about him all the time. I remember her talking about you too, and how close you were for mother and daughter and that she loved you very much. I thought it was really sweet that you had such a good relationship. I don't know what else to say, again I'm so sorry for what you must have gone through. I will think of Rachel often and fondly, and hope that in some form she is free and happy and at peace. The world will miss her passion, kindness, and her voice, as will I. Best wishes, Dave

Miss you much
From: EAA
Date: 16 Jan 2006
Comments: Can't believe it has almost been a year without you. We have all managed to survive and go on because we have had to. But, I miss you so much, buddy. I really do. I know you & Rachel are doing good things because that is the kind of kind spirits you both are. News from you through the psychic person who wrote into the message board doesn't scare me or surprise me. It comforts me to know that all is well. That sounds like something you would say. And I know you are both around ... Know you are loved, buddy ... EAA

Today and Always
From: Aunt Lisa
Date: 22 Jan 2006
Comments: On this date, 1/22/06, one entire year has passed. There has yet to be a day that you are not thought of, and most often this is inspired by something of beauty. Doesn't that just make perfect sense? The first thought when I hear a beautiful song, listen to a talented musician, see an incredible sunrise, sparkling skyline, or a striking image........Rachel & Cody. Your impact in this life continues to be one of peace, beauty, hope and love. When I considered where I would be closest to you on the eve of this day, it struck me that a small venue, with young musicians would be perfect. Strangely enough, the events of last night led me to just such a place, and through no direct action of my own. There I sat thinking...."Rachel & Cody would love this place, this music and very likely they would have been on-stage". I hope you heard those thoughts and I know that I'll find ways, just like last night, to stay close and connected to you. Our path on this earth can be a rocky one at times and thoughts of both of you provide a smoother path to travel. I'm honored that I am your Aunt, your friend and knew you on this earth. It has, and always will be, an inspiration. With more love than words could ever express, Aunt Lisa~

the kids
From: danie (from letter received in e mail)
Date: 30 Jan 2006
Comments: I dont know how I landed upon the website you have for rachel and cody bit I did. I read all the poems and looked at all the art work. I also read what you wrote about the 2 of them and the accident. I am nothing more than a stranger to you, but as a writer and some one who has lost someone I am truly sorry. I know how much people can influence others and I think the website is amazing. Her words and songs are nothing less that inspirational. You are an amazing person and no doubt very strong. What you did for their dedication is amazing. They are truly living on in peoples memories, and now in mine! Thanks for your time ~Danie D'Ambrosio

February 13
From: Jacquie / Mom
Date: 13 Feb 2006
Comments: Just wanted to write and say hi and that I thought about the kids a lot this weekend and their lives, what they taught me about living, loving others, and being a part of a unique family called the human race. Their capacity for love and understanding was amazing. They truly had serving hearts. Love to all, Jacquie

letter about kids
From: Mariana
Date: 19 Feb 2006
Comments: Hello, my name is Mariana, for some reason or the other I was searching on Google for something and I came upon your website dedicated to Rachel and Cody and it got my attention so I started reading on and I felt so touched. Rachel really reminds me of myself, always filling every notebook with scribbles from the heart, and believing in people. It seems as though Rachel and Cody were very beautiful souls. My passion in my life has always been poetry but I recently stopped writing because I guess I wasn't inspired anymore, I cringed at the thought of writing again, I thought I had nothing else to say and no one cared anyway, but reading about your daughter and Cody really inspires me to keep on writing, because I owe it to myself. I have everything I could ever want right now including a special bond like Rachel and Cody had, there is no reason why I shouldn't be exploring my true potential even if it’s just for my eyes only. Even though, you don't know who I am I thank you for sharing these two great souls with me. Mariana

Re: letter about kids
From: Cody's Mom
Date: 20 Feb 2006
Comments: Mariana: Both Cody and Rachel would be touched by your words. Don't stop writing or creating. Even if you are the only one who ever reads your words.

Comments from Germany
From: letter from Katrin
Date: 22 Feb 2006
Comments: Hello, I was just surfing the internet and I found this wonderful homepage about your daughter and Cody by a fluke. My name is Katrin, I am 17 years old and come from Germany. Although I didn't know Rachel and Cody I think they were wonderful persons who loved their lives. I read almost the whole website and found it so awesome. I just wanted to let you know that I love this website! Yours Katrin from Germany

missing you.
From: Patty
Date: 28 Feb 2006
Comments: Hey Cody, I just...I miss you. Life is so crazy right now, and I just wish that you were here

Rachel in a dream
From: Amber Smithers
Date: 06 Mar 2006
Comments: The last time I saw rachel was before she moved from Oklahoma. I have many sweet girlhood memories of being with her (and Courtney and Hannah) and the joy and wisdom she brought, even then. On new years(2006) eve night I only got about two hours of sleep but I had a dream that Rachel came to me. She seemed like an Angel. In the dream she told me to do what I knew to do while I was still on earth. She told me to do art therapy with war-torn children, which is something I have contimplated for some time. The dream just seemed so real...and I took is seriusly. I just wanted to say that I think Of Rachel often and my memory of her helps me keep things in clear perspective. love, Amber

Wish you were here
From: Heather
Date: 10 Mar 2006
Comments: I wish you were here to see my belly growing and to hold my baby when it's born. I always thought I'd have the two of you here with me, making fun of how fat I'm getting! I know you're here, watching over me, anyway. Love you and miss you.

Thoughts
From: Courtney B.
Date: 11 Mar 2006
Comments: Its almost Rachel's b-day again. I think about her all of the time, just about everyday. The past year has been the most difficult to bear of my whole life. The enormity of losing someone who I have always considered to be the big sister that I always wanted was a lot to sift through. Since Rachel's death, I have never read the message board on this site. Today was the first time I looked at it, and it made me want to boohoo my eyes out. When Rachel died, I went to her memorial and was gone for three days and I came back, and everything was back to "normal" again. I went to work, I put gas in my car, people were still shopping in Target. Nothing was different. And it made me mad. I remember looking out the window of the store I worked at and realizing that people were driving past. No one but me was different. I remember thinking, "What? Shouldn't the whole world be weeping, too? The whole world should know that she's gone... it's like a hole was torn in the universe. Why is everything so damn normal?" I was wondering how the world was still rotating, I was wondering how the world COULDN'T pause and take notice of her absence. When I read this message board today, I realized that I was wrong. The world DID pause. And I thank all of you who paused to recognize both the lives that have been lost, and the lives that have been effected by the loss. In January, around the "one year after" mark, I was doing henna art on my hands, thinking of Rach and Cody, I was thinking of Rach's parents and my own, considering the pain and fear I'd seen etched in their faces this year. As I was pondering the past year, wondering if I had gotten better or worse, I suddenly got the overwhelming sense that although I will always feel sadness at the loss of my friend, God was saying that this is no longer the time for grieving, and that it was okay to accept the healing He would give. Even though I have a long way to go, I'm ready to accept healing. And I think that Rachel would agree, because she always hated to see her loved ones hurting. I hope that all of you can one day come to a place in your life where you can accept the healing that God has waiting for you. Happy Birthday Rach! I miss you tons...

happy birthday rachie
From: mom
Date: 17 Mar 2006
Comments: just wanted to say happy birthday. a day i will never forget. what a beautiful baby. i miss you so much. this past year has been so hard with out you. my nights have become my days that i spend with you in my dreams, days have become my nights when we sleep. i love you honey, mom

birthday
From: dad
Date: 17 Mar 2006
Time: 23:37:32 -0500
Remote Name: 68.97.83.33
Comments: you would have been 23 today. miss you honey.

Happy Birthday
From: Jacquie
Date: 18 Mar 2006
Comments: Happy Birthday Rach. The angels sang the birthday song to you I know on your day. And I sang it to you in my heart. Love, Jacquie

Moments That Are Special........
From: Aunt Lisa
Date: 19 Mar 2006
Comments: Rach...I know you heard the many wishes of "happy birthday" expressed verbally or thought by me and many others as well. Although it's important to me to give special tribute to the day that marks your birth, the moments in every day that contain thoughts of you are special. For those brief moments, the clock isn't ticking, I don't hear the phone ringing, the world sort of stands still and my heart and mind is filled with thoughts of you. There is nothing else in this world that "transports" me out of the whirlwind the days can become or puts such a big smile on my face....except for these special moments that are "you". Always & Forever, Aunt Lisa

Missing
From: Jac
Date: 28 Mar 2006
Comments: I miss you. Love, Mom

Re: Missing
From: darnell (mom)
Date: 29 Mar 2006
Comments: yes, we miss you both so much. we will never look at the world the same. we all love you, mom

some reason
From: heather w
Date: 02 Apr 2006
Comments: for some reason i havent been able to take rachel and cody out of my thoughts lately. they were such amazing people, but anybody that knew them could tell you that. even after they left us, they inspire me. rachel's wisdom beyond her years and cody's quick painful wit. they were the truest people i have ever known; it gives me peace that people like them really exist.

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